I can't believe it's been so long since I've written here. In one sense a lot has happened since I last wrote here, but in another sense not much has happened.
Regarding the "not much" perspective, I've been mainly on a mad pursuit to get the condo set up before my spinal problem (identified as being at T11-T12, where my first spinal surgery was in 2008) took over and I couldn't work on it any more. I was also trying to get it how I wanted it and keep on budget, which was somewhat of a tall order, but now I'm pretty sure I can do it. The thing is, though, that I've been doing like 99% of this sitting at the computer because I didn't feel up to driving around town, although early on I visited 3 or 4 stores, including the local Ikea. All this while I've been keeping dilligent records and I have an Excel workbook populated with many spreadsheets and links and notes too many to count (well, I guess I could if I really wanted to, which I don't).
Another aspect of the "not much" part of my recent life, is that because of my health I've pretty much been limited to medical appointments, the grocery store and drug store. I think it's safe to say that everyone at the drugstore knows me by face and go fetch my prescriptions without my having to identify myself, although they make me cite my address because that's a store policy. Also, the physical therapy people all know me quite well too. I think we're coming upon a full 12-month run of non-stop physical therapy, interrupted only by my cervical surgery in January.
My offer on the condo is still with the bank and last I heard they wanted to do another property assessment, although my lawyer and realtor both think this is just routine and nothing to get concerned about.
This week my health took a dive for the worst but I think we've got all the imaging, nerve conduction tests, etc. done now. I'm having to be ultra careful about twisting, turning or lifting because my legs are much worse and my g.i. system is taking a hit, so it's nothing to mess around with. I have to at least maintain my current status until Aug. 23 when I see the neurosurgeon after he returns from vacation. I want to try to have continuity of care and not jump around from doctor to doctor, although there reaches a point where if I woke up one morning completely paralyzed from the waist down I wouldn't hesitate to call 9-1-1 (the aid care) and could end out with a different neurosurgeon.
Another way in which some things have happened since I last wrote is that my relationship with one of my brothers seems to have taken a dive for the worst also. That is, I came out with some recent things that really made me mad (including something from this winter that mom told me and which put new light on him). I haven't heard since from him, so I assume that's not good. He's got lots of support where he is so I'm sure he can get along quite well without me. He's the one that is still where we were all raised, so there's church, family and long-time friends there. Of course, the fact that he didn't want to answer my accusations makes me all the more think there really is something to it. I don't think I need to go into the details right now though.
I've packed a few things away and some people from church came and helped move things around so we could pile boxes that would be out of the way. I'm not doing much more box filling right now, though, partly because of my back, but also because I don't have many more boxes and am not up to scrounging around for more. But I don't think I should be doing that kind of thing (and it was, I think, my moving boxes of books out of a wardrobe-type container that I'm getting rid of and am going to need the space for more furniture coming, which will have to be moved eventually to the new place) which is responsible for the downturn in my health.
I packed up all the materials I was using for this blog, except for the current file. Maybe in my health-related inactivity I'll be able to work a little more on it again soon. But I still haven't sent out thank you notes to those who sent in donations in mom's name to the church. I was going to do that last Tuesday when I woke up so much worse (after moving boxes of books).
One of the things mom said the last few months of her life was that some of the things I've been writing here she and dad weren't aware of. Part of the reason for that was that, starting in the mid '80s when I was in Chicago I began to have a hunch that dad's work was affecting me and I began to lose trust in him. He was always "right" and I think it would have been foolish for me to just come up to him and tell him what I was thinking. I learned by experience after my return from Russia that he would agree with me on these kinds of things only if it would publicly make him look bad not to. I don't think mom understood these things, just like she didn't understand she shouldn't have told my brother about my concern about seeing him hit his son. So even if I had told her and dad, dad would have convinced her I was wrong.
Anyway, I'm still in the land of the living, albeit not in the best of health, and I haven't forgotten this blog. My current dilemma I'm trying to resolve is how to carry dirty laundry across the hall to my storage/laundry room (each unit in the complex has such a room external to the unit itself) and then bring the clean laundry back. What I would like is a 3 part sorting cart with a lid on it and a rack for hanging clean clothes and linens and a compartment for clean folded items. I want it to be easy to use and discrete so the whole world doesn't see my dirty laundry (they see enough of it here on this blog - sorry, I couldn't resist that one). It appears that such an item does not exist, or at least has evaded me in my Google searches to date. I think I'm going to have to have separate carts, one for bringing dirty things to the laundry machine and the other for bringing clean things back into the apartment.
